Trinidad?!? Yay!!! (and, gulp)

I just got confirmation that I will be going to Trinidad for a conference the end of February!!!!!

And while I am beyond excited, I also got the first tremor of doubt. “Will my summer clothes fit??”” And, “There’s going to be a bikini involved, isn’t there??”

I leave in a little less than six weeks. I don’t want to get into a crazy mentality wherein I go on a juice fast, or start going to the gym for hours a day. However, I do want to dedicate myself to the goals that I outlined. You see, last summer I went to the beach with some of my teammates from football couple of times. In looking at the pictures taken on two separate days, I made an interesting discovery about how I look; it’s mostly in my head.

See, I could remember on one day, the more recent, I was feeling nasty about myself. I even hesitated in joining the other ladies because I felt so flabby in my two-piece*. In the other, which was taken a month or two prior to the first, I was feelin’ HAWT, strutting my stuff and posing coquettishly for the camera. However, in the first I actually weighed about ten pounds more than in the second. The difference was that in the second I was exercising regularly and eating well (which obviously lead to the loss), whereas in the first I had been eating nasty foods and not exercising during the few days prior to the beach visit.

The moral of this story is that my feelings about my body have less to do with what I weight, and more to do with how I’m treating it. Which means that if I treat my body well in the next few weeks (by exercising enough, but not overdoing it, and by eating well, but not restricting), then I will feel good on the beaches of Trinidad.

* I feel the need to state that my brain has an amazing defense mechanism, wherein no matter how much I fret and frown about my appearance before I leave the house, I almost always forget about it the minute I’m out and about. Contrary to the tone of the above, I consider my body as a doing thing, not as something that is meant to be out on display, so I’m always more inclined to say "fuck it, I'm going out to play" when it comes down to the question of do or don't.