Day 10 - Keepin' On

I feel I need to be regular about tracking somewhere, so I here I am, although I don’t have much to say at the moment. I weighed in this morning at 150.8lbs after 10 days of trying to be diligent. This would seem like such a fantastic accomplishment, if not for the fact that I hit the same number on Saturday and then promptly fell off the rails, making the work of the past 4 days directed to correcting my foolishness.

I’ve been pretty consistent with my training. However, I did have a couple of minor binges over the weekend and on Monday night. I know their cause, a lethal combo of sadness (usually generated by a sense of unloveliness due to Nick) and restlessness. I keep going in circles about what I should do about the situation, but at least I can acknowledge its presence.

I’m going to keep on keepin’ on and will try to be more faithful in posting.

Steppin' (and day 5 and counting...)

151.8 today, so slightly up. I’m working accept the fluctuations of my body and recognizing that half a pound of gain is nothing to stress about. There is a fine line to walk here, because it’s that laidback attitude that caused the 10+ pound gain of the past year. However, I do think that it’s a valid attitude when one is eating well (check), monitoring portion control (check) and exercising almost daily (and check).

I’m still struggling to move more during the day. I’m not talking about planned exercise, because I’ve gotten up for an hour of boot camp at omigod o’clock every morning for the past five days. I’m referring to the small things that tend to add up through the day like walking to someone's office rather than calling them, walking to do errands and whatnot. I really try to do what I can, taking the stairs and parking further away and all of that. And yet I’m struggling to hit 10,000 steps on my pedometer.

Why do I care? Because there are studies that show that people who have no problem maintaining their weights or who are “naturally” skinny are actually those individuals who tend to be twitchier and who just move around more in the natural course of their day.

My weight gain corresponds pretty closely to when Nick and moved in together, and I can think of three reasons why. 1. There has been more tension and I’m an emotional eater, so I’ve done the food comfort thing more than I used to. This made worse by 2. Nick’s habit of keeping snack food around, something I never did when I lived alone. If I wanted ice cream I went and bought an ice cream cone. I NEVER bought a tub of ice cream ‘cause I knew that when I was feeling emotionally frail it would call to me. And 3. I used to walk about an hour to an hour and a half a day to and from work (and maybe more to do other errands) and now I’m a commuter in a city that’s not pedestrian friendly.

I obviously need to address all three (or deal with #1 so that #2 won’t be an issue?), but #3 seems like the most manageable as it doesn’t deal with icky emotional stuff and it doesn’t require behavioral changes in Nick.

I’m going to keep working on it. Maybe I need to start braving the Canadian winters on my lunch break and go for a walk. While that’s an obvious solution, is it one that I will enact?

Day Three Check-in

I was on the road all day yesterday so missed my daily check-in. I’m happy to say that there’s been an initial loss bringing me to 151.4lbs. I realize that this is water weight, reduced because my focus on whole foods correlates to less sodium, but bloat affects the fit of my clothes so I’m grateful.

I’m trying a three-pronged approach; exercise (resistance and cardio), diet and general twitchiness (that I’m monitoring by wearing my pedometer at all times except when I’m working out so I don’t double count). Each day I succeed in one of these (and success is by my own yardstick), I drop a dollar in my piggybank, so I can deposit up to $3 per day. This is my fund for a trip that I hope to take in the spring, or will just be mad money if the trip doesn’t manifest. I’m a little behind already, but I can still save about $60.

4 weeks

Bonjour, mes amies!!!!

I’ve been all over the place in terms of health and weight loss over the past couple of months, but mostly I’d give myself a fail this autumn in “Taking Care of Loey 101”.

To sum up,
I recognized that my weight had increased to the point that some of my fall/winter clothes didn’t fit properly.

I made A LOT of false promises to myself to make changes.

I didn’t.

I’ve been wearing many of the same things again and again.

I’ve gained ANOTHER few pounds. No, really.


I’m very disappointed in myself. And I miss my clothes and the ability to grab anything in my closet and wear it with confidence rather than trying desperately to find a pairing of bottoms and tops that work. And I miss just being comfortable with myself.

So here I go again. I’ve signed up for a 4 week bootcamp. I realized that on-line training plans may work in the future, but right now I need some face-to-face accountability. So every weekday morning I’m attending this camp for an hour. The woman who runs it provides individual assessment at the start of camp (I went last week) in the form of weight, measurements and body composition analysis using calipers, and then the same after camp is over.

She said that I could lose 2-4% body fat by the end of camp, and more if all my ducks are in a row. So I’m lining up the duckies, and plan on taking names and kicking butt for the next 4 weeks. I’m strongly competitive, so there’s TONS of motivation in being held up as an example of fat loss.

I’m also going to try to blog regularly and post my weight weekly (ugh).

So my starting points;
Chest – 35.75”, waist – 30.25 “, hips – 41”
Weight – 157 lbs (at her place, late day, with jeans), 155.8 lbs (at home, this morning, nekkid)
Body composition – 28.6% body fat

My problem...

I know my biggest obstacle; late nights and poor sleeping habits.

This is the cause of most of setbacks. I have trouble getting up and doing my workout, which means that I'm inevitably going to struggle to fit in later today (i.e. today I have a football practice with the kids’ team I coach, which means that I won’t get home till 8:30 tonight, so I will hopefully get my workout in during my lunchbreak… hopefully…). I can accept that some workouts will be missed because life gets in the way, but this scramble could have (and should have) been avoided.

Being tired makes me more prone to cravings, specifically for simple sugars and carbs, both for the sugar rush that they will bring (and of course the inevitable crash, but that doesn’t seem to be in the forefront of my mind when I’m like this), and for the comfort aspect.

I’m up late doing nothing. No, really, nothing. I can’t sleep because my head is too busy, but I’m too tired to do anything productive. And because I’m up and bored and frustrated and Nick is in bed asleep I’ve got a scenario that covers several of my food triggers. I pick and pick, mostly on healthy foods (because that’s pretty much all that’s available in the house), but it will put me over my calorie goals.

So I’m missing workouts and undermining my nutrition… no wonder I struggle with my goals. And aside from all that, there’s a wealth of information that supports a string link between good sleep practices and a healthy weight.

Now that I’ve identified this, I have to figure out what to do. The obvious answer is “just sleep more”, but that’s like saying “just eat less” to someone who’s struggled with their weight for any length of time… there’s no “just”. I’ve been on medication for my sleep problems, but they always leave me fuzzy headed in the morning, and I’m concerned about the long-term side effects. I’d really like to develop some holistic solutions.

Did I turn a corner????

I don’t know. The dietician has been helpful, but I was still FAR too indulgent in sugar and simple carbs, so my behavior was in no way modified since the last post. However, two things happened that have started me down a new path;

1. Fall came early to Canada.
What does this have to do with anything? you may ask. Just wait a mo’, I answer, I’m getting to it.

2. My pants don’t fit.
No, really. See, all summer long I wore cute skirts, dresses, capris and long shorts. Some were bought this season, but even those bought last season for the most part fit. I lamented the few pairs of shorts that were tight, but for the most part I was able to blissfully ignore the fact that I had gained a few inched around my middle.

But then the weather turned, and last week was getting pretty cold. And I tried on my jeans and pants.

The horror.

I have one pair of jeans that currently fit properly, and they were ones that I stopped wearing last year because they were too baggy in the waist and bum. I have another pair that wearable as long as I’m careful about which top I pair with it because the muffin top is VERY noticeable.

And as for my dress pants that I would usually start wearing to work, I’m down to one pair.

I can’t afford to replace my wardrobe, so I realized I had to actually start walking the walk. I decided the only way to break my habits and/or addictions was to go cold turkey. So I’ve been completely off the sugar and refined carbs for almost a week mow. That includes EVERYTHING with sugar, including sauces and dressings, pre-packaged soups, all breads, everything. I’m going to aim for two, maybe three, weeks before I start introducing even a trace of sugar back into my diet.

My intention is that by that time I will have broken any physical addition to sugar and won’t be jonesin’ for a treat every couple of hours. And I will have broken the habit to do so.

Is it working? Well, I’ve been craving less junk, although I’ve been perhaps too indulgent with other things (i.e. nuts, popcorn etc.). However, I think that these were crutches of sorts, and I’m tapering off those as well. And I do feel like my belly is less bloated.

Annnnnd as motivation, I’ve jumped on Glam’s Grand Muffin Melt-Off bandwagon.

Sugar Monster!

The past few days I haven’t been able to get enough sugar in me. The worst part is that I keep lying to myself about how, “this will be the last thing, once I have some ice cream/chocolate bar/licorice/scone/whatever-as-long-as-it’s-filled-with-sugar I will be SO done with sugar.”

LIAR!

Here’s a bit of perspective, Loey. You just last week spent about $300 in signing up with a dietician to help you work through your sugar cravings and achieve your goals. You received a very comprehensive plan, with more than enough food, but with some flexibility built in.

So, what the hell??!?!!? I mean, what’s going on in your weird little head that’s not allowing you to make even vaguely sensible decisions?? And aside from the caloric over-spend, have you thought about the actual monetary overspend?? ‘Cause remember, you’re currently heavily in debt??? Remember??!?!?!

I’m so irritated with myself right now. Let’s tally up the spend today;

Morning scone and cookie: $3.00
So-so lunch (both in tastiness, but also in healthiness): $15.00
Afternoon snack run: $5.00

So, 23 dollars of tummy-ache and remorse.

And the most shameful part?? That I went to two different stores to get enough sweets for my mid-afternoon binge. I haven’t done that for a long time, and I’m really upset about now that the sugar-high is fading.

This is the turning point (yes, yes, I know, for the 879th time…ugh…)

Tonight I cook some of the recipes that were suggested to have in my fridge for lunch and post-football. And I’m going to bed very early tonight.